Is your personality killing your business? We all know someone who seems to chronically get in their own way. Short-tempered and short-sighted, they don’t realize that these personality traits are getting in the way of greater business and personal success. Often these folks don’t know how people feel, so how do you know if this is you? And, if it is and you’ve developed these bad habits, how do you change them?
It really comes down to uniting with someone you trust, someone who’s opinion you value, that you can be candid with and who will retain your confidentiality. You also want to partner with someone who doesn’t have a vested interest in your results, like an employee, who won’t be truthful with you. Better to choose a peer or even a customer, someone who sees you “in action” quite a bit, working with suppliers, clients/customers and staff and can give you genuine feedback on what those interactions look like.
What happens, then, if you get bad feedback from them and it turns out your personality might really be getting in the way of your business? You need a role model and that person may be the same as the one who’s been watching you. Look around your company, your church, among your friends and in your own business dealings for someone who seems to have that piece of their business and life together. They’re likable, their business is growing, people seem to respect them and flock to them. Identify and model some of the behavior traits that make them successful. My guess is that you will find these among those traits:
Patience
Humility
Recognition of others
Transparency/honesty
Humor
Flexibility
Willingness to teach or share information
Start identifying these and other traits, find someone you can model, and start implementing these changes gradually. Personality is largely something we are born with and challenging to change but is done every day. Be patient with yourself, continue to seek honest feedback and you will find your relationships, business and otherwise, drastically improved.
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
None of the items you mention have anything to do with “personality.” To the extent that an individual’s personality gives the appearance of having character problems, one of two things could be going on. One is actually poor character. The other is simply poor fit. What’s appears “arrogant” in a universe of nonprofit staff may be completely appropriate in a universe of stockbrokers.
As hard as it might be to change careers, changing one’s personality is far more difficult, probably undesirable, and maybe impossible.
I agree. Personality was a universally understood word to capture things like character, tempermant, behavior. But then my blog title would have been too long
. There are conflicting studies suggesting that a)our tempermants are fixed and nearly impossible to change and b)others suggest that we have an unbelievable capacity for change and growth (which I prefer to subscribe to).
The point of the post was that many people do not realize that things like THEIR OWN behavior, emotional intelligence and attitude could be turning away customers and to encourage each and every one of us to do a thorough self-examination of these things before delving deeper into other, less-controllable areas.
Make sense? Regardless, I do appreciate your input!